Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Soup's On, Um Er, Off


I love soup and it's chilly today here in Prince George, BC, on Victoria Day, a day to honor the Queen.
So I order soup at DeDutch Restaurant, an eatery, we discover, that serves a motel, so it's no more Canadian than I am. Or elegant.

But it has free Wifi, so we decide to eat there.

With the soup, I order a patty melt (no cheese) on sourdough bread. Allen orders bacon and eggs and pancakes.
Our 20-something, fashion plate waitress bobs her head when I ask about the soup. Pea soup, she says. "We always have pea soup," she bobs, smiling wide, showing her teeth.

She can't vouch for the soup, because she's never had it. But (the bobbing resumes) she's seen it and it has carrots in it, and bits of meat, probably ham. And it's always available.

Her words end, but her head still bobs.

Yum. Pea soup. One of my favorites.

I'll take a cup, I say, along with my burger.

She bobs and bobs then heads to the kitchen, about two feet away.

I hear clangs, bangs and dishes breaking, then a voice sails through the storm: "Well, I eat my soup out of a bowl."

Soup? Are they talking about MY soup? More pointedly, ME?

Seconds later, Miss Bobbin' stands table side and asks, "Do you really want your soup in, like, a coffee cup?"

HA! They WERE talking about my soup.

Oh, sweet youth. She's never heard of a cup of soup.

No, I assure her. I'm not talking about the vessel. I just want a small amount of soup.

"We serve our soup in bowls," she says, and, yes, she's still nodding, and, clearly, misses my point.
So, I tell her, bring it on. I'll take the bowl.

She does.

And, it's AWFUL. Terrible soup. Perhaps it sat out all weekend (this is Monday) and spoiled. It tastes spoiled.

So when she returns to ask after our meal, I mention the soup's inedible. And she nods, and scrunches her nose, and says, "I imagine so. It's just powdered, you know."


Yes, I reply, when she asks if I'd like it removed from our bill. Which, with the soup removed and the tip added, closes in on $40. For a burger and eggs with pancakes. But, of course, no soup.

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